


the late evening breeze

by Layni1771



Series: Stray Kids AUs [16]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Beaches, Blond Felix, M/M, Ocean, Personification, Romance, Seo Changbin is Whipped, Seo Changbin-centric, and bunch of thinking, felix is a foreign high school dropout, he visits the beach changbin hangs at, never thought i'd say that, that was a look, there is one line of dialogue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-26
Updated: 2018-09-26
Packaged: 2019-07-18 01:44:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16108181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Layni1771/pseuds/Layni1771
Summary: Changbin watches, yet again, as Felix's bare toes slide between wet grains of sand, making lightly unpleasant noises. The rocks give him cramps when he steps on them wrong and the shells cut his feet. Dark red is left behind like a sad trail of teardrops, drop after drop staining the scenery in something strangely enthralling.Felix is an anomaly in Changbin's repetitive daily life.





	the late evening breeze

**Author's Note:**

> Hi hello~ I've been in a good mood today so I decided to go ahead and post this. Please excuse any errors as it isn't proofread, and minor warning for blood! Spoilers in the end notes.

Meeting Lee Felix is a curious thing, really.

Changbin is simply existing in his own world when it happens as he always does. He speaks to no one, he sees no one, he just simply is in this place. Felix, however, changes this with his blindingly unique smile and deep voice that carries far and wide, engulfs Changbin in shivers and rushed feelings because he is stunned. The ocean waves are crashing when Felix steps onto the beach with bare feet, sand squishing between his delicate toes with each careful, light step he takes. His blond hair shines in the late afternoon sunlight and Changbin stares from his place, tilted and inquisitive while this boy _step step steps_ his way towards the cold water of the shore. His pink lips are puckered in concentration while he stares at his own feet. Each step is sincerely considered and measured, but not with safety in mind.  Changbin can tell this because the boy steps on rocks and shells without hesitation, even when the rocks make his focused expression falter with pain and the shells break, cutting his feet enough for them to drip a steady trail of red across the damp sand.

He leans forward in anticipation as this boy in denim shorts, a blue-and-white striped top, and an open white collared shirt finally meets what Changbin assumes is his destination. The blond child stands on the tips of his toes, arms outstretched and fingers spread loosely, his neck tilting lazily so his eyes can stare at the haziness of the setting sun. Changbin watches the calf muscles tremble with the effort it takes to keep him there, but his expression does not change from one of serenity, chest rising and falling so softly that if Changbin were anyone else, he would not be certain that he is breathing. The water meets his toes and he shivers, but does not leave his spot even when the water so heartlessly steals the sand around him away.

It stings to watch the salted water wash over the new wounds on the boy's feet, but he does not seem to mind them so much. Changbin moves forwards with sense of hesitance unusual to him, fluttering and soft as he takes his usual path. It's unusual for him to have company. No one comes to this part of the beach, but the new boy's presence will not stop him from his routine. Changbin is a force that cannot be challenged. He is a constant where the blond child is a variable, and so he glides right past him, just barely ruffling the simple clothes as he moves to counter the force of the waves. A deep, gentle laugh reaches him, and he cannot help but look back. As he does, Changbin is met with his very first smile from Felix. It is all purity and softness, something so inherently joyful inside of it. Though he does not yet know the boy's name, Felix speaks,

"So this is what it's like."

Changbin has no answer for a nonquestion.

 

He comes to learn Felix's name when the boy speaks, sitting on the drier sand and leaning back against his palms. The cuts on his feet from the previous day are bandaged when Changbin learns this. He notices that despite the injuries, Lee Felix does not wear shoes today either. That is just fine with him. Footprints are prettier than shoe prints in the sand, and he likes it best when this beach is pretty. He wonders, but he does not question. He does not question when, day after day, Felix returns and shares new facts about himself. He is eighteen years old. He has dropped out of high school and cannot decide if he regrets it. He has a number of friends, and even lives with one who is, apparently, also from Australia- This is another fact Changbin has learned, listening to him speak. Felix is a foreigner, much like his name and accent suggest.

Changbin learns that he likes to dance and listen to music, that he bleached his hair based on a dare, that he likes to count the stars at night, that he hates the morning. Felix is a compilation of facts in Changbin's mind. There is no room for assumptions nor inferences. He only thinks of what he knows to be true. Things like the information about himself that Felix has shared, observations, and the actions he has taken in Changbin's presence. It is true that Lee Felix has stepped on seashells and broken them. It is true that his calves struggle to hold him on the tips of his toes for an extended period of time. It is true that his small, shaped face holds a countless number of freckles, gifts from the sun. Felix has said he has been bullied for them in the past, but Changbin knows that freckles are simply the sun's way of saying hello.

Felix is like a book, really. He reads easily until you look further into the text and try to pull out the key details that tell you the true story, the one hidden under layers of symbolism and foreshadowing that the author surely did not mean to add in. Changbin likes this about him. He lives his life in a series of moments, and Felix adds substance, something new to these with the uttered facts. He does not need to delve deeper where Felix isn't sharing.

He shares a lot, however. There are many sunsets where tears mix into the sand.

The blond boy only seems to come during the evening, when the sun is nearly starting to set, as far as Changbin has noticed. It is possible he goes to a different part of the beach during the day. He does not have a way to check. Such a small thing does not matter. He appreciates the company, though it is not daily. No, Changbin still finds himself frequently alone as the sun finds its resting place beyond the visible line of the ocean. As it finds its rest, Changbin can relax. His journey is done for the day, and he can return to his place, peacefully so. It is nice, however, when Felix is there to relax with him. They seem to melt the same way, rustling up the loose sands and drying up the wet ones. Felix will speak in that low voice, the one that gently presses at the spaces around them and making Changbin feel rather unusual. The way it meets the empty air, lays just a current beneath it, is unique.

As the sun finds its daily casket, the moon rises from theirs. This blue-hued light is striking against Felix's cheeks. The sun's hellos become like the moon's goodbyes, echoes of stardust left behind on such delicate features. His eyes glisten with silver shine as he releases everything to Changbin. His words sometimes stick to his mouth like marshmallows, dense but paradoxically light and not the easiest to handle. But Felix does not leave a single word unsaid. He speaks.

He always speaks.

 

Changbin supposes this is the aspect that he falls in love with to start. The way that Felix unambitiously yet freely says what he feels the need to. There are no secrets kept from Changbin. He lays himself bare and vulnerable, he relates all of his honest thoughts, he tells all of his stories. They all add to Changbin's compilation of facts. It is the initial dimension that makes Changbin just a few degrees warmer, a small bit more soothing. But there is more. There is that voice, surprisingly suitable for his youthful appearance once you hear the words it has to offer. There is the sun's hellos that transform into the moon's goodbyes that draw his attention. There are the eyes that hold a million stories and animated lips that tell them all for the eyes' sake. There are his careful but not cautious steps that he takes every once in a while so the ocean pulls the red from his bloodied feet and they become one.

Falling in love is not so painful as Changbin expects. He has always been under the impression that it would hit him like the waves do the shore when there is a storm, and he shivers and cowers under the force of the powerful winds. It is intense, hard to miss, impossible to ignore, violent even. These are the ways Changbin expects falling in love to be, but he finds it to be so very different.

Instead, it is a whisper. One that he can easily pass by as each day comes to an end, but is unfailingly there. It layers across him and his existence like dust thickly does an old book. This process of falling in love is quick perhaps in the grand scheme of things, but for someone like Felix, it is a lengthy amount of time. Changbin wonders what it would be like to live as him. He spends each day as he wants to, free from any expectations that are not his own. It's so unlike himself, who has such rigid rules to follow, his every move dictated by a force he cannot simply reject or say no to. Perhaps, if he tried, he could rebel, change. But this would only cause problems for many, and he is not willing to make himself a nuisance. It is easier to follow the guidelines and enjoy the time he has with Felix. This child he has fallen in love with.

He cannot be so simple about it, though. What he feels for Felix is so much more complex than that. It is frayed knots of rope and the salted sea, the way sand only kicks up in certain moments and _the late evening breeze_ that appears as the sun is laid to rest. These things tangle together mercilessly, create a mosaic of realities that are not one but fit together in a broken imitation of such.  Changbin appears to be the only one who can appreciate this, and so he does. He finds pleasure in the way his love is not easy to read. It would simply hurt him if it were so easy for others to decode. He believes that, above all, this love he has come to feel for Felix is not meant to be flaunted- Not that there is anyone for it to be flaunted to. But Changbin keeps it close and dear to him, as tenderly as one does a newborn, because it is very new and very precious. He wonders if he has been waiting for something like this to come around.

Changbin watches, yet again, as Felix's bare toes slide between wet grains of sand, making lightly unpleasant noises. The rocks give him cramps when he steps on them wrong and the shells cut his feet. Dark red is left behind like a sad trail of teardrops, drop after drop staining the scenery in something strangely enthralling. Changbin cannot seem to stop himself from seeing the way Felix pauses, standing on the tips of his toes. The muscles in his calves strain and tremble. He tilts his head back to stare at the hazy sun, arms held out and fingers just a little spread. Changbin accepts this reality and brushes by Felix again, savoring the brightening grin he receives for his efforts. Changbin is in love.

 

Yet Felix is only human, and Changbin lacks the ability to do anything about this. This is the most important in his compilation of his facts, his book of Felix. This is one truth that cannot be altered at all, that will be a constant until he meets his end one day. That day, Changbin hopes, is far away. It would simply ruin him, should the blond boy meet such an early demise. Too painful, too sad, even if him meeting his end could potentially set in motion the future Changbin wishes, pines for. The reality is that Felix is human, and those are such limited things. They lack the ability to do so much. This, he is intimately familiar with. But never before has Changbin felt so constrained by this. Never has a fact caused him so much weary sadness before.

He watches as Felix enters the beach. Changbin says hello with the fluttering late evening breeze.

Felix does not look at him once.

Changbin is in love, but he is so very alone as Felix speaks to what he believes to be the empty beach air.

 _I am here_ , he wishes to shout. Such a thing is impossible for a being like him, so he gently engulfs Felix in his late evening breeze and hopes it brings the weeping boy comfort.

**Author's Note:**

> (To explain, Changbin is a nature spirit, specifically that of a late evening ocean breeze. So Felix has no idea he exists, much less that Changbin has heard all his words and fallen in love with him. When he mentions Felix meeting his end and setting in motion a future he hopes for, it is because in order to become a nature spirit a human must first die, and as such the only way for them to truly meet is for Felix to pass and become one as well.)


End file.
